failed... again

DISCLAIMER: The post below is a long rant from the author, she writes from what she was told, saw and feel.. please don't hate her. if facts are wrong, that is because she didn't know.

yup... went for the interview again yesterday, and this time i didn't even pass the written test.... what's funny is that i felt the first time i did the test, it was HARDER than the one i did yesterday..... and i got through the FIRST time and not the second... weird isn't it?

hmm.... the receptionist asked me how did i find out about this interview... so i told her i am an employee and trying to get into that dept, then she had a laugh (with a hint of mocking me), she said "why didn't u try internally?" like duhh... I DID but OBVIOUSLY i didn't get it....*rolls the eye*... so come to think of it, if i didn't get the job INTERNALLY, what makes u think i can get the job like anybody else? gosh! i'm so stupid! *slaps the forehead*

i felt so down when i was called to leave the room... i was like WTF man!? i felt i managed to answer at least 60% of the questions.... but no, that wasn't enough.... well what to do? 2nd time.... some say the 3rd will be IT, but that doesn't work for me, i failed a few papers in college, and i always thought i'd get through it on the 3rd try... but NOOOoooooo... i only managed to get through .. what... 5th time? (i can't remember now...) so should i try for this post 5 TIMES??? no way man!!! i don't think so.... what if this job isn't really for me? i mean, just because i studied IT doesn't mean i can do this job right? i know ppl who managed to get through... they're really lucky bastards.... i even gone to college with them and they had NO idea what they were studying (they even had to ASK me to explain some stuffs to them!! WTF), and they got through... how FAIR was that man!

maybe i should just register for ShutterPoint, take pictures and earn my living from there and also put AdSense to my blog and earn from here too.... sigh....

*frust*

so looks like i'm gonna be stuck in answering stupid sales reps calls with more tasks... a place where u can't climb the ladder, a place where permanency is the LEAST (or mybe NOT in the list) important of plans for ppl like us... we've been told many many things, promised many many things, but nothing has happened, yes there was changes... like more work to do (which is good cause that doens't make us TELEPHONIST!!! but we are still telephonist to everyone else outside the team)... the last week was horrible.. the whole team had a change, a change that affected most of the members but with what reason? NONE.... i don't see the point of all these changes also..... sigh..

very bad week indeed...... what makes it the end of a sucky week superbly TERRIBLE? having my period! sheesh.... how worse can that be man!!! i could just punch anybody now!!! ggrrrhhhh